(NOTE: I started this post on Friday and didn't finish it. So I saved it. The next day I watched the 2nd Season Finale of "Rick & Morty", and the episode is all about the Exact Thing I'm yammering about right here. How weird is that?)
Y'know why I don't really read Superhero Comics anymore?
I mean, I love Superheroes. Loves em. I love the Cartoons. I love the TeeVee Shows. I love the Movies.
So, why don't I like Superhero Comics all that much anymore?
Obviously, part of it is just the sheer volume of Superhero Comics I've read. I mean, I've read just about every kind of comic under the sun. Superhero, Horror, Crime, Romance, Sci-Fi, Western, War, Cosmic, Humor, Funny Animals, Surrealist, Slice-of-Life, Autobio, Biography, Historical, Historical Fiction. Comics from America, Comics from Europe, Comics from Japan. Right now in my living room is a whole stack of Manga. There's sci-fi manga, action manga, adventure manga, fantasy manga, samurai manga, wrestling manga, sports manga (yeah, I've even read SPORTS Comics), comedy manga, pirate manga (ONE PIIIIECE!), heck, I've got a stack of a manga called GTO which is about a former street punk who decides to become the greatest Teacher of all time. Yeah, I've read a comic about teaching. I've got a comic about cooking. I've read just about everything by Alejandro Jodorowsky (Google him, thank me later). I've read Comic Strips from just about every era, from Krazy Kat to Popeye to Bloom County to Pearls Before Swine. I've studied Floyd Gottfredson's Mickey Mouse and Carl Barks Uncle Scrooge. Golden Age, Silver Age, Bronze Age, Modern Age. I have done the Underground. I have stacks of R. Crumb. I've read some Johny Ryan. I love my Love and Rockets, especially anything by Gilbert. As a Small Press Comic Creator I have Bought and Traded HUNDREDS of Small Press Books from every conceivable genre from every type of creator, Male, Female, Straight, Gay, Transexual, Christian, Buddhist, White, Black, Asian, Latino, Indian, Young, Old, In-Between. I don't have many blind spots when it comes to comics. There's John Byrne (just can't bring myself to care), Walt Simonson (tracking down that Thor run in an affordable format has been tricky, anyone got any tips?), and I've never got around to reading Alan Moore's Swamp Thing (I know, I know, but everyone's gotta have a ridiculous blind spot, right?).
What I am trying to say, trying to explain, is that Comics are my Life, and I love them (not as much as my Family or my Mei, in case any of them are reading this), and I've read an absolute crapton of them in every conceivable genre, and that I know my stuff. But what I've read the most of, what I enjoy the most, are Superhero Comics.
So, why don't I read that many Superhero Comics anymore?
Part of it, again, is familiarity. When you've read so many Superhero Comics, it's hard to find all that much new material. There's a definitive, seen-it, been-there, done-thatness to it. Part of it is all the insistent continuity. The cross-overs. The Events. The Reboots. The Rewrites. The Reimaginings. And oh Lord all of the GARBAGE. Superheroes Die. Their Sidekicks Die. Their Friends Die. Their Families Die. Their Sons and Daughters Die. And then they come back, conquering Death Itself. Then they Die Again. Lather, Rinse, Repeat. Superheroes become Supervillains. Supervillains become Superheroes. Supervillains pretend to be Superheroes and everyone buys it for awhile, until something dramatic happens. Superheroes reveal their Secret Identities to the World and then a year or two later something happens and everyone magically forgets or something stupid like that. We change the status quo, we hang out with the new way for awhile, and then we come back. Back to where we started. No one really changes. No one grows. No one evolves. Or if they do evolve, it's brief, and it's always followed by a deevolution. Always. And that's a big part of it, that inconsistency. That lack of consequence. That lack of change. The Silver Surfer is Norrid Radd for awhile (yawn), then he's Galactus's Herald again for awhile (usually for no particularly good reason), then he's no longer Herald and trapped on Earth, then he's free to roam space again, then he's trying to find his humanity, then he's right back to being Norrin Freaking Radd. Over and over and over again until I can't even bring myself to read a Silver Surfer comic because it annoys me too much (and I LOVE the Surfer).
So there's all of that.
But there's something else, and it's connected to that. My problem is that...
Superheroes would change the world.
I mean, I know we kinda show that in Superhero Comics, and we see it in all of the Elseworld Books and the Alternate Timelines and the Event Comics, but I mean, seriously we always come back to "This world is basically our world except there's these special people in it". And it wouldn't work like that, right?
In Watchmen, Superheroes changed the world. Comics were different. You didn't need Superhero Comics, so you got Pirate Comics. The Policeforce got tired of Superheroes and created a whole political bruhaha that made Superheroes illegal, so that only one crazy die-hard (and two government sponsored) superheroes were left. But the Big Thing was the Cars. Yeah, the Electric Cars and the little Plug-in stations innocuously situated all over the place. One superhero changed the Arc of Technology for the Entire World. One. And all of that's not even counting the whole "The Presence of Dr. Manhattan Sped Up the Timeline and Hostility of the Cold War leading to a Nuclear Countdown to Absolute Extinction that could only be Averted by a Completely Crazy Scheme Involving the Deaths of Thousands of Innocent People Enacted to by a Psychopathic Genius Profiteer in a silly Egyptian Costume" Thing.
Now, take a second, and really think about what Batman could really do in the world. Just Batman. No other superheroes. Just Batman. No superpowers. No supernatural powers. Just an Olympic Body, a Supergenius Brain, and more money than God. Think about lightweight Body Armor that is bulletproof and fire retardant, readily available to the police force and the military, nationwide. Think about lightweight polymers, and the applications. Think about lightweight stealth aircraft and the possible military and police applications. Heck, let's move off the Police and Military Track. Think about the Batplane on a consumer level. Think about "All Those Wonderful Toys" and their possible impact on the world at large. Think about the Supergenius Brain being applied to Energy Solutions, to public transport, to the medical field. Think about that Iron Will that causes a man to chase down bad guys and risk his life night after night after night, and apply that same Will to medical research, to energy research, to finding ways for the police force to stop crime in a Non-Lethal Manner (is there any topic more pressing right now?).
Think about it. One superhero who's not even super and what he could do and how he could actually have an impact on the world.
Instead, he sulks in his Batcave, hoarding his fancy technology and gadgets for himself, just so he can maintain an edge against all those crazy people he spends his time chasing down.
Say what you will about the Dark Knight Rises, at least Talia al-Ghul had it figured out. She hacked his stuff and mass produced it and brought Gotham to its knees. Batman hoarded his crap for himself, so that when they stole it, they had the edge over the GCPD. Hard to fight a convoy of those heavily armed Batmobiles, ain't it?
That's always the way though. The Marvel Universe is so much worse. Think of all of that technology Tony Stark's got going on. Think about all of the stuff that makes that Suit work. Now apply any of it to the world. Heck, in the first Captain America movie, we see Stark's Dad displaying a Floating Car in World War II. And yet, in the present, no Hovercar. Reed Richards could mass produce Hovercars. And advanced spacecraft. A world with Reed Richards in it (let alone a Tony Stark and a Hank Pym) would look absolutely nothing like our world. It would be at least a hundred years more advanced in every conceivable way.
And yet it's not, is it? Maybe it's the God-Thing. The Gods on Mount Olympus keeping their Secrets from Lesser Mortals for fear of the damage they'll cause. Or maybe it's just that no one wants to think that far ahead. Of course, the obvious reason is that we need to set it in the Real World to make it relatable. Gotta make the stories believable, even if the actual logic doesn't hold true. And it's hard enough for dozens and dozens of writers and artists to work together within the confines of a shared universe without the rules always changing (Hey Guys, heads up, the new Stark Model Hovercar is out, and it looks like this, and we wanna make sure everyone draws a few into the new issue. Thanks!).
I dunno. It just makes everything seem small. Why aren't there Kree and Skrull and Shi'ar ambassadors on Earth? Why aren't there Human Ambassadors in Space? When he's seen the Future, why hasn't Stark reverse engineered any of that stuff? Shouldn't Earth be an Intergalactic Tourist spot by now? I mean, if you lived on some crappy, boring planet with space travel capabilities, wouldn't it be way cool to travel to some planet where people in spandex and robot armor fly around and fight stuff and shoot lasers?
I mean, let's reduce this down as far it would go. No superheroes, no superpowers. Just one anomaly. The Punisher. One guy who hunts criminals with a dogged determination we've never seen before. Someone with the arsenal, the skill, and just enough cleverness to stay alive and ahead of both the criminals and the cops. How would that affect the world? Really think about it. Obviously there would be an effect on crime. Think about it. Why do people turn to crime? In some cases, it's the only way out, but for the most part, crime is the easy route. It's cheating. Are there consequences? Sure. You could die, gunned down by cops or a rival criminal. Otherwise, it's prison, which means you sit around, have some horrible things happen to you, you get out, and it's back to crime. But the rewards outweigh the risks for most criminals. Now, think about this idea. If you commit a crime, there is a very real chance that some angry guy in a skull shirt will gun you down. Suddenly, maybe the risks don't outweigh the rewards anymore. Maybe crime's not such a great idea when that Black Van comes rolling through your neighborhood. And even if criminals weren't afraid of the Big, Bad Punisher, the numbers would start going down. Sure, criminals die all the time in the real world, but they don't die organized, do they? They don't die with purpose. They're not Hunted, not even by the cops. The numbers would go down. And what about the media? I watch the St. Louis News every day at lunch, and every day there's at least one murder. Sometimes more. Every day. Always reported. Now what happens when a singular person is doing all of that? The news would eat that up with a spoon. Every day there would be a PunisherWatch report. Police sketches of what he looks like. Reports on his latest victims. Man on the street interviews. Talking Heads debating the merits and morality of his actions (Imagine the NRA reaction? They would LOVE the Punisher). How would the Police react? Well, there would be task forces. Specially trained units. Sting operations. And every dirty cop on the force would be gunning for him so they could get a big, fat bonus from their bosses. And that's not the end of it, is it? Because a guy like that, he's gonna inspire people. All sorts of people. All those gun nuts who like to walk around in broad daylight with automatic rifles in Texas? Think about those guys if they knew there was some guy out there doing exactly what they say they do. How would that play out? (The answer: Ugly) What about all those shellshocked War Vets? Maybe they see the Punisher, and they see a future that doesn't involve waking up from nightmares about roadside bombs. They've got the training too, right? Maybe they don't quite have that Steel Resolve, but there's something there, isn't there? Maybe they get organized, find others like them. Maybe they're not a bunch of dumb rednecks who just wanna parade around and act big. Maybe they're smart and clever and serious about this. Maybe there's more than just one guy with a skull on his chest now. And maybe it's not just one city anymore. How far does it go? How far does it escalate? Think about corruption. Think about those Veterans, and how they've risked their lives for our government, our way of life. And think about how badly they've been screwed. How little they get paid. How hard it is for them to adjust to life back home, how screwed up the VA System is, how few jobs there are. Think about them fighting for Democracy, and yet what democracy are they fighting for? A handful of rich people control our government, bailing out banks and making life comfortable for the rich. Meanwhile, their buddies are dead because the US couldn't "afford" proper body armor. The US can't "afford" proper benefits for veterans. Now, think about an organized, dedicated, rogue Military Force devoted to the downfall of corruption. Really think about it.
And that's just the PUNISHER. The least of all Heroes. And, yeah, we've seen some of that in the comics, but only really in the self-contained ones by Garth Ennis, and even then everything would always just kinda reset, wouldn't it? The Punisher would change the world.
Now, let's go the other way. Let's go as far as we can go.
GALACTUS.
Galactus shows up on Earth, threatens us with annihilation, and is somehow repelled, never to be seen again. That's it. Now, how would that affect life on Earth? Well, for one thing, we would know for a fact that life on other planets exists, and that it is superior to us (yes, I know, in our scenario, Galactus is repelled, but he isn't destroyed, which means he could show up any time, right?). How does that affect our Government? Do we start fast tracking outer spatial defense technology? Do we start forming better relations with other governments in order to form a stronger outer space defense force (ala Watchmen)? Do we step up our space program so that we can start scouting for further threats? What about religion? What happens to our religions when they encounter something beyond their comprehension? How do you continue to preach the power of God when a giant in purple armor shows up and almost destroys the planet? What happens when you've seen real power? What about all of those crazies in the tin-foil hats? Those guys aren't so crazy anymore, are they? Wouldn't people start to view Galactus as God? Start religions. The First Church of Galactus the Destroyer. The Holy Order of Galactus the Savior. Suicide Cults. Attacks on other religions. Holy wars. We have seen the Truth! We have seen the great lord Galactus, and one day he will return and usher us all into the great Heaven Beyond! We must pray to Galactus so that he can hear us out in Space and take us all into the Promised Land! All blasphemers are to be destroyed!
(Again, we kinda saw that in Moebius's Silver Surfer series, but again, it all ends with a nice little bow at the end, don't it?)
There is no bow or wrapping paper. Japan still suffers from the two bombs we dropped on them. It affects their literature, their manga, their movies. There's a scar there. There's a scar on us. We lost two towers full of people, two planes full of people, and a whole bunch of brave men and women who rushed to the rescue only to die in the line of duty. And the scar cuts us so deep. It changed us. Changed who we are. Changed how we looked at the world. We've cut scars in the Middle East so deep they'll never heal, they're only going to fester and turn gangrenous. Everything affects everything. Worlds Change. Reagan dropping regulations on the Banks in the 1980s led to the Financial Crisis of the 2000s, a crisis that has changed us as well. Ripples. Puzzle Pieces. Butterfly wings.
Fiction is fiction. It's not real. So holding any of this up to the standards of real is stupid and ridiculous. This is something I say all the time. But, fiction is our escape. Our doorway out of this reality. And we all have different tastes. I like all kinds of stuff on Movies and TeeVee. Movies and TeeVee are small. Limited. I accept that. But Comics? Comics are HUUUUGE. They're massive. There's thousand of lives moving through time and space in a thousand different directions. And yet, over and over again it's always back to start. Over and over again the world doesn't move. Civil War (the Marvel one) changes everything. Until it doesn't. Until everything that happened doesn't happen. And I find that boring.
I read the Mike Mignola books because they're the opposite of that. In the Mignola-verse, the world has changed. Irrevocably. There's no going back. In fact, in the latest issue of Hellboy in Hell, we have even seen the shape of the World Beyond. This excites me. Worlds Change. This excites me.
My Universe, My TORCverse is always changing. This excites me. It excites me that I'm seeing Strange New Worlds. New Races. New Cultures. I'm seeing places between places, places beyond places, and it's all chaos. All in flux. Always changing, building, redefining. I'm curious what will happen next, because I know there's no bow, no wrapping paper, no easy answers. It will continue to change shape, and I get to watch it. This excites me.
Now what was I talking about again?
