Four & Thor 7

Let's Roll...

Fantastic Four #13
Story/Art: Jack Kirby.  Inks: Steve Ditko (!!!).  Plot/Dialogue:  Stan Lee.

Story:  There's a fire in the Lab, because Reed's making a new kind of rocket fuel from pieces of meteorite.  Turns out Reed wants to get to the moon before those darn Ruskies.  Speaking of which, a Russian scientist and his trio of trained apes are also getting ready to roll for the moon.  Everyone takes off for the moon at the same time.  Although the FF's new spaceship is shielded from Cosmic Rays (fool me once...) the Russian ship intentionally isn't.  Thus, the Red Ghost and his Super Apes are born.  The Red Ghost can phase, the Gorilla has super strength, the Baboon's a shapeshifter, and the orangutan has magnetic powers.  Meanwhile, Johny's got a suit that lets him use his powers in space (fool me once...), so he spies on the Russian ship, but gets repelled by the orangutan.  Everyone lands on the moon, the Blue Are to be exact.  Turns out that not only is there an old abandoned civilization up there, but there's also an atmosphere.  Handy.  Also, there's a weird mystery house.  While everyone else goes to investigate, the Thing gets left behind and runs afoul of the Red Ghost and his Apes.  There's a bit of a fight, and then the Watcher shows up.  The Watcher breaks up the fight, declares that he's from an ancient race that just observes stuff and never interferes, but then declares that the human race is getting all savage.  Before they can rip up his home on the moon, the Watcher interferes and teleports everyone to some other area of the Moon so they can fight among themselves for dominance of the moon or something.  The Red Ghost and his apes take an early advantage and kidnap Sue (hmmm, that's a bit of a running gag).  The Red Ghost locks her up, but Sue uses food to trick the hungry apes into freeing her.  Sue then saves the others from the Red Ghost's latest trap (disintegrator ray, baby!).  Without his Apes to back him up, the Red Ghost flees to the Watcher's House.  The Watcher gets pissed (maybe the Red Ghost didn't wipe his feet), and then displays a wide variety of ways that he could punish the Ghost (lost in time was my personal favorite), and then decides just to throw him out.  Reed uses a Paralysis Ray (gotta love it) to stop the Ghost.  The Watcher declares he's leaving the moon since the humans are too close, but he'll continue to peep, er Watch, us from the other side of the Galaxy.  Meanwhile, the Apes free the Red Ghost, only to turn on him and chase him off.

Notes:  Lots of neat stuff in here.  Obviously, this marks the debut of the Red Ghost and his Super Apes.  Maybe not the most pivotal of FF Villains, but they're still a part of FF History.  More notable, of course, is the debut of the Watcher, one of the noteworthy of all of Marvel's Cosmic Beings.  The Watcher has been featured in numerous comics throughout the years, and has played a role in lots of major comics stories, including many of the Kirby/Lee FF stories that are to come.  Other than that, we get the Blue Area of the Moon (a pivotal Marvel location that will be returned to repeatedly throughout the years).  Other Fun Stuff:  Reed's got a Fireproof Stretch Suit.  Also, Disintegrator Rays and Paralyzer Rays.  Fun!

The Art:  Ahem.  Jack Kirby Pencils.  Steve Ditko Inks.  Oh yeah.  Although I still prefer Joe Sinnott and Mike Royer Inking Kirby, it is always something of a treat to see Ditko inking Kirby.  The art becomes this weird amalgam of the two, and the scenes on the Moon are hauntingly beautiful and strangely alien, and Ditko's inks are the major reason it looks this way.  In other words, this is a lovely, offbeat issue, art wise.

Whatta I Think:  Great Issue.  The debut of a pivotal character, the debut of a formidable group of villains (and they be Monkeys no less!  Oo!  Oo!  Ah!  Ah!), and the two trailblazers of Marvel working together.  Just wonderful.

Fantastic Four #14
Story/Art: Jack Kirby.  Inks:  Dick Ayers (sigh).  Plot/Dialogue:  Stan Lee

Story:  The FF are back from the Moon, and that makes them Super Celebrities.  Everyone freaks out, and it be like Beetlemania.  Johny uses a Hot Tornado (Kirby seemed to like Tornados) to get everyone back home.  Sue is still pining over Namor.  Meanwhile, turns out the Puppet Master isn't dead, he's just getting out of a Sanitarium.  The Puppet Master decides to use Namor as his pawn, so he makes a Puppet Namor, and we are off to the races.  Under the Puppet Master's spell, Namor uses a Mento Fish (you heard me) to psychically contact Sue into meeting him.  Sue obliges, and Namor captures her using a Hypno Fish.  The FF take off after her, and Ben brings along Alicia for absolutely no good reason.  The FF go Sub diving, and run into all sorts of undersea troubles.  Johny burns his flame white hot which keeps the water and pressure off of him (hey, Kirby and Lee weren't scientists, y'know?) and clears out the dangers.  Regardless, the FF's Sub gets Swallowed by a Giant Clam (there's a joke there).  The FF and Alicia are taken to Namor's HQ, where they find Sue being guarded by a giant squid.  Johny attacks Namor, but Namor humbles him by using a Fish that devours Flame.  Yep.  The Thing steps in, and has to deal with Razor sharp coral and a fast growing fungus.  Reed steps in, and turns himself into a living net that binds Namor.  Meanwhile, the Thing tosses the Squid out of the tank and frees Sue.  Namor attempts to kill our heroes with a Poison Gas Plant, but Reed saves the day with his Plastic Gas Masks.  Meanwhile, the Puppet Master has been monitoring everything from a Sub of his own.  Unfortunately, the Giant Squid catches the poor fool and crushes his sub, killing him.  Again.  Namor is freed from the Puppet Master's control, and everyone calls it a day.

Notes:  I think it's hilarious that the Puppet Master dies a horrible, embarrassing death at the end of every issue he's in.  It's a little hint of Kirby's offbeat sense of humor.  The other funny thing about this issue is the menagerie of crazy fish that Namor uses in this issue.  Further proof that Namor is a billion time superior to Aquaman.

The Art:  Well, we're back to Dick Ayers and his blorpy inking.  Eh.  Still, lots of cool stuff here.  The weird fish, giant squid, Reed turning himself into a Living Fish Net.  Plus, we get a pretty decent fight scene.  Not bad.

Whatta I Think:  You've got two choices with this issue, you either roll with it or you think all of the super fish are stupid and this issue is a waste of time.  Me?  I think this issue is a hoot.  I want more of Namor and his weird Mutant Fish.

Journey Into Mystery featuring Thor #95

Art:  Joe Sinnott.  Script:  R. Berns.  Plot:  Stan Lee

Story:  There's a drought in Asgard.  Odin calls up Thor, who makes it Rain.  Thor returns to Earth where Dr. Zaxton is demonstrating an Android created by Dr. Blake (wait?  What?).  The Android is super strong and immune to Thor's hammer (really?).  Zaxton accidentally makes the Android self destruct.  Thor saves the day by chucking the Android into orbit.  Later, after Thor has reverted to Dr. Blake, Zaxton shows up and declares that he has a Duplicating Machine that will Duplicate Anything it Shoots (groan) and he needs Dr. Blake to help him finish it so it can duplicate people (groan) and he's kidnapped Jane Foster (groan) to ensure Blake will help him.  Zaxton finishes his machine, finds out that Blake is Thor (groan) duplicates Thor (groan), makes a duplicate of Mjlonr (groan), and what follows is the dumbest fight scene in history as Thor fights Thor (and another Thor pops up later).  In the end, Zaxton duplicates himself, only to fall to his doom, leaving his Good Copy behind.  GROAN.

Notes:  I hate this comic.

Art:  Who cares?

Whatta I Think:  So bad.  So, so bad.

JIM #96
Same creators as before.

Story:  Hey, they've found the Crypt of Merlin, and Merlin himself is inside.  Turns out, Merlin, who's totally evil and wears a stupid wizard costume, has been sleeping for a long time.  Oh, and Merlin's a mutant.  Merlin tries to divert a rocket to prove his power, but Thor stops it.  Merlin tries to make JFK his new King Arthur, but he doesn't realize JFK is the Prez cause he's too young (groan).  Thor finally catches up to Merlin.  Merlin levitates the Washington Monument (there's a joke there).  Thor stops that.  Merlin drops the Pentagon on Thor, but Thor digs his way out.  Merlin makes the Lincoln Memorial come to life and attack Thor, but Thor knocks Honest Abe back into his chair.  Finally, Thor defeats Merlin by turning into Dr. Blake and claiming that he can turn into hundreds of forms and that he has lots of other powers (even though he doesn't demonstrate any of them).  Merlin becomes terrified of Lame Ass Donald Blake and flees back to his coffin, returning to his Mystic Slumber.

Notes:  Well... this may be the first time that the Lincoln Memorial is brought to life.  Considering how many times I've seen that gag, this book gets credit for that.

The Art:  Better than last issue. 

Whatta I Think:  Eh.  Better than last issue.  Still terrible.

Two Interesting Issues of the Fantastic Four, and two of the worst comics I've ever read.  Eh.  It's a wash.